Thursday, January 31, 2008

The Snot Sucker

Because I am not able to live the life of a stay at home Mom I have been forced to place my child in the second layer of Hades know more commonly as "daycare".

The first day I sat in the parking lot and cried for ten minutes. By the next week I had whittled it down to five.

Now I just sniffle my way to work.

So where my first darling angel..aka "the wee V" made it all the way to the ripe old age of one year old before getting any sort of illness...Spud has already been felled by a cold, passed on to him by the unwashed masses at the hellish establishment.

Now..while men have been known to be big babies when sick..they really can't compare to an actual infant..at least the big guys can blow their nose.

My little spud has not mastered this (in fact I have learned that most babies havent even mastered mouth breathing by two months) so the only thing Mom and Day can do to ease his discomfort is to drop saline nose drops into his nose and take the nasal aspirator to his little snoot in an attempt to clear his breathing a bit.

Now for those of you who are unfamiliar with the nasal aspirator, it also goes by the name of "bulb syringe" but in our house it is known as 'The Snot Sucker'
Which is exactly what it does, you squeeze the big bulbous end, stick the slender end in his little nostril and..."ssssssssnooorkk" out comes the snot.

Suffice it to say, Spud does not enjoy this process, he starts yammering at us when he see's it and hollers infant obscenities at us when we've finished evacuating his nose..ending with what we have affectionately begun to call "Giving us the stink eye" Which consists of peering at us hatefully from the slit of one eye as if he smelled something foul.

Fear not he has wraught his revenge already..Daddy is currently home having been felled by the mutated "daycare plague"..and I am drinking Emergen-C like vodka cocktails...in hopes that the itch at the back of my sinus' doesn't catch my immune system in a weak moment.
(because after all, I'm newly returned to work and thus have no sick leave banked)

Of course I still look like shiny like a newly polished Penny ;-)

These slippers are made for STOMPIN!


Spud...is he not so cute you could just EAT him??