This time I am sure he said TAGGED

I got tagged by Tideliar again...woop...once more and I get a free toaster..

Five Things in my Freezer
1. Frosty Paws (c'mon you knew they were there!)
2. Trader Joes French Toast (the wee V loves it)
3. A bag of frozen veggies that I use as an icepack
4. Vodka (still unopened)
5. Ice

Five Things in my Closet: (hall)
1. My much loved and much destroyed Doc Martens
2. Soccer Stuff (shoes, knee brace, shin guards, balls...ect ect
3. Fire Extinguisher
4. Baseball Bat
5. 3 boxes of soda - 2 boxes of Fresca and a box of Diet Caffeine Free Dr Pepper (It tastes more like regular Dr Pepper you know)

Five Things in my Car:
1. Empty cigarette box (from a very long time ago)
2. Handy Wipes
3. blanket
4. about 30 pens
5. Wales Rugby jersey

Five things in my purse (other than my wallet..duh)
1. plastic fork
2. 4 tubes and one pot of lip stuff
3. Adderall
4. ATM receipts
5. Rescue Remedy

And since everyone I know on this "scene" has been tagged..I guess my buck stops here (unless I think of someone later..because I just cannot be arsed now)

The Heat makes people do crazy things...

Theres a joke about everyone from Minnesota being born in late summer and fall, because there aint a whole lot else to do in Winter. (My father was on summer break when my brother was conceived, and home on leave from the Marine Corps for me hence our early-mid summer birthdays)

Well I have noticed that in the more southernly states...theres a whole lotta getting on..going on in the summer.
Maybe since they're already hot and sweaty they figure..what the hell?
Maybe it's all that exposed tan skin.

But I actually saw a couple seriously getting into in..in the frozen food section of my grocery store yesterday.

I actually said "Holy Crap" because the sight of two people pressed so close you couldnt get a slice of saran wrap between them..his knees wedged between her legs and his hands on her ass sorting hoisting her up..well you dont expect THAT to be blocking your way to the Frosty Paws (thats ice cream for dogs...they were on sale..ok?) on your average shopping excursion.

I was stunned into statuary.

I know its rude to stare..but...Huzzah.

Whaaaaat?

Yesterday afternoon I am diligently slaving along at my place of enslavement when...pffft.

My computer reboots itself...Well crap.

After the reboot...it does it again...and again.

So like a good little office lemming I call my MIS department and say "My computer has gone postal and is holding me hostage, please bring a gun"

After staring my my computer attempting to reboot itself again..it is officially declared dead.

And I get..a new hard drive...and therefor lose everything on my old hard drive.

The MIS guy asks me "Do you want me to attempt to recover anything from your previous hard drive?"

Frantically searching my memory...not for important work mind you..but illicit ramblings/pictures/blah dee blah blah I may have stupidly saved (or not so cleverly hidden) and would very much NOT want recovered and viewed by our MIS department..I say "Um no, thats ok, I'm sure I can recollect whatever information I may need"

Dammit..

Let this be a lesson..for whatever you wish it to be..
It would just be a shame to lose all my "stuff" without one..dont you think?

The Trip To WhizKonSin..The Departure/Arrival...

Our departure from the lovely Reagan National Airport (which will forever just be "National Airport" to those of us who know best) was delayed 35 Minutes...

Immediately this raises the red flag of alarm for our beloved heroine, because being able to tell time she realizes... that if the plane is scheduled to land in Milwaukee at 3:35 pm, and her connecting flight to Minneapolis/St Paul departs Milwuakee at 3:25 PM, there is a problem..So she calms walked up to the counter jerk at the MIDWEST counter and politely says "Sir, my connecting flight departs 10 minutes before we are due to land, this is a problem"

Counter jerk-wad says "Yes there are actually 8 of you transferring the plane will wait"

I doubt this, but can hope. And really cant blame counter jerk for being a lying queen with over gelled hair.

Upon landing in Milwaukee at 3:40 I am not too suprised to discover, the connecting flight has departed.

I am considerably more suprised to learn that the next flight to MSP departs at 9:40pm.
FIVE HOURS LATER.

So we are given a 20 dollar food voucher at the Midwest desk, I called my sister in law in time for her to stop her 1 1/2 hour drive and turn around...to drive back later.
And trudge off to kill some time in Milwaukees airport and partake of the fine airport cuisine.

These are some things we learned while whittling away the hours.

1. There is a candy bar called a cow pie in Wisconsin, and it is yummeriffic...and tastes alot like a turtle (the candy..not the aminal)
2. Most of the food vendors stop selling food between 6:30 and 7pm (thankfully the wonderful woman at the bookseller was kind enough to tell me this, before I was unable to redeem said voucher)
3. A 20 dollar food voucher will buy: 2 Pizza Hut personal cheese pizzas, a large drink, a bottle of milk and a bag of chips
4. There is not only a Harley Davidson shop, but also an aviation museum in the airport.
5. They sell something called "cheese curds" at the variety shop.
6. They also sell those big foam cheese wedges people wear on their heads (packers fans)
7. BEER IS NOW CHEAPER THAN GAS, so several gifts in the shop declared..
8. Starbucks coffee does not come in decaf there...the wee V was hopped up! (but really with 5 hours to kill did I care? nope)
9. Acid washed jeans still look like crap, even more so as...SHORTS..on men.
10. 5 hours is a very very long time to kill in Milwaukee's airport.

Finally we depart (Midwest has given us 2 seventyfive dollar vouchers towards our next flight) arrive in Minneapolis St Paul at 11:30..ish..and discover..Yup our bags didn't make the trip.
Apparently 5 hours wasnt enough time for the cheeseheads to ensure our luggage arrived with us.
I am not pleased, and trudge along with my other "transferers" over to the desk to report said lack of luggage.
So when the wee V exhausted and stressed starts to cry (mind you this is 12:30 our time) I do not stop him, but glare at the counter lady as I dramatically soothe my angel.
Dirty pool I know..but I'm petty sometimes.

I give the woman the address I am staying at in Eau Claire Wisconsin (noting her alarm at the distance with a bit of satisfaction) collect my second set of 75$ vouchers and head out to my sister in law handily parked at the curb..

We've arrived....

more to come...

The prodigal penny has returned

I'm home..on terra homa.

My luggage however, is in milwaukee.

I'm am tired..and good lord it is hot here.

Will fill all of you lovelies in on my shennanigans in the dairy state...when my brain arrives ..like the silly girl I am I packed it in my checked luggage.

Yawn...back to bed..or at least the sofa

Wisconsin...Smell the Dairy Air.

I'm leavin on a jet plane, dont know when...oh wait yes I do...I'll be back in 10 days.

I am going to Wisconsin..why you ask?? Brilliant question!

I am going to visit my brother and his family...and the Minnesota contingency of my familt topiary...will be coming down on the 4th to visit ...and drink Old Milwaukee no doubt!

My brother is a hoot, he's very serious and responsible.

I actually like my sister in law (she's gorgeous as well so she fits in nicely)

My nephew and my son are separated by only 5 months..so havoc will be wrecked there...little hooligans.

But I have to admit, while I love my family all equally I simply adore my neice. She is 12 (oh dear lord maybe she's 13?) Anyway I adore her.

She is simply the most interesting and fascinating person of any age.
Se has Aspergers (look it up I'm in a hurry) and she is quite frankly brilliant.

Unfortunately, she is at the age where being slightly different, gorgeous and brilliant..is not so easy when you go to school will hateful little cows masquerading as preteen girls.
So a nice long hang out session with Auntie Penny is just what she needs.

Anyway, I gotta go get ready to leave.

If I dont post before...Happy July 4th..

Celebrate our independence from the oppressively tyrannical Great Britain!

:-P

God what a day...

I'm beat.

Conversational A D D

(I wrote this last night, but didnt post it until this morning..blerg)

I just got home from my soccer game..which we won.
Go us.

Anyway, today at work the top I wore necessitated the wearing of a strapless undergarment.
Because the showing of bra straps is growled upon at my place on enslavement.
My strapless brassiere is a torture device, it is by all practice standards...the upper half of a corset, complete with rib gouging boning to keep the girls upwardly mobile.
So naturally by about 3:30 I am uncomfortable and ready to hurl said evil foundation garment out the window...since I could not..I did the next best thing and whined to my co-workers about the uncomfortableness.
Which of course diverted into a conversation about bras in general..and then one of my coworkers blurts out that she cant go braless because her nipples are really large and pointy outy (ok she didnt use pointy outy, but I edited for my amusement)

begyerpardon?

Now, There is such a thing as oversharing with your co-workers, granted there is a fine line between talking about brassieres and discussing what fillith thine cup.
But it exists, and it should not be crossed.

After a few stunned moments I simply said "Well thats unfortunate..back to work I am!"

and fairly sailed back to my desk..

I'm back...and now on to something more important..

Breathe easy my little minions, I am fine.

The beginning of June is simply a sucky time for me, so I retreat in my shell (like a typical cancerian) and emerge all shiny and new in a few weeks..with my hard crunchy shell intact.


Anyway, enough about me...
As you know if you've been paying attention. I dont post about the goings on...going on...on someone elses blog...but, today I read Tideliars blog about the loss of a childhood friend recently who died while serving in Afghanistan.
My heart broke for him. Regardless how you feel about this war, or war in general....losing somebody you know, never mind care for, brings it crashing into your solar plexus like a fist. That someone so alive in your mind is now gone, and there will be no more memories to be made..

I have been there, and it sucks more profoundly than words can ever express...the great gaping hole where a memory used to be.
For a while, the memories take on a pain all their own, and when you visit them, they hurt so much they literally take your breath away.

And everytime you hear of it happening to "someone else" it all comes rushing back, I know they say time heals all wounds, but I think it is easier to simply say that in time you learn to live with some wounds, and they just become part of who you are, they no longer define you, but they have shaped you.

And those who still have someone "over there" when you hear about something like this, the fear is beyond terror, because the only way to survive is to not acknowledge that it can happen to anyone even to ____, or else it will drive you mad.

So, Tideliar my very dear friend. My heart goes out to you. I feel your pain, and I grieve with you over the loss of your friend.

I have no words that will make it "better" because they simply do not exist..

It just sucks.

Godspeed.

Well that would explain my lofty self image

howmuchareyouworth?
I am worth 1,911.356.79

Pocket change...

And they say all Scandanavians look alike.

This is me not get publically intoxicated at an awards banquet with my friend and co-worker Nora.
She shares the blessed genes of Scandanavia with me...

I've been tagged?..could of sworn he said shagged...

Well a fine thanky doo to tidlee, I've been tagged.

Ten things I loathe about my job (yes I know he changed it to 5 and 5, but I'm a purist and resist change)
1. Inflexible hours: Whats up with that crap? Who cares if I'm here at exactly x or leave before y? ..as long as I get the work done. Case in point..I'm here right now!

2. The customers..the customers..the customers. Every stupid person on earth has me on speed dial.

3. That young shit upstairs who is fresh out of college and think being president of his fraternity makes him cool, it doesnt, it just gives me something else to mock him for.

4. Our dress code. Professional during the week with business casual on Fridays, and this is only because our current grand pooh bah used to be a Governor. I want the return of Friday's wearing my Levi's!

5. CUBICLE. Need I say more?

6. That group of horrid women who meet in the bathroom and make fun of other women. I wish I could get away with giving them all swirlies, mean cows.

7. Having to explain something elementary to the higher ups, who just shuttle it off on their underpaid and overworked Admins, or after my one hour tutorial ask "Well could you just do it for us, you understand that stuff"

8. I am surrounded by women who spend the entire freaking day gossiping..about each other to each other..they skulk on over to x to complain about y..then simper to y to kvetch about x..

My Grandmother told me...if they gossip TO you..they gossip ABOUT you..


9.Did I mention I have a CUBICLE?

10. The unwillingness of anyone to go out of their way to obtain knowledge that might be helpful to someone else. Its always "Thats not my job, that's Eduardo"
chowderheads.

Now two things I love:

My director, he is the schizzle in the twizzle. At my previous company I was micromanaged to the point I swear she knew the color of my knickers from hovering behind me so much.
My current big cheese trusts my capabilities and supports my decisions and my work.

Plus he never gives me crap if I need to leave early..

A good boss type person makes up for all the other crap.

And my co-worker Crystal, who is simply a taller version of me..but she can sing.

There are few things funnier than hearing a 6ft blonde with a southern accent say "How would you like a nice cup of Shut the F*ck up?"
Hilarious.

Tonights million dollar question...

Seriously gentlemen..answer this for me please, and ask your friends.

Why does it bother some of you, when a woman is better at SOME sports than you are?

I like being a girl, I'm feminine..

I have looovely long hair, I wear make-up..

But just because I happen to play a sport better than you on occassion..why is this a threat to you? Why does this piss you off?

Theorectically you say you like a woman who's athletic..but is the caveat ONLY if she doesnt actually perform better than you on the field of play?

I do not dance around and say "I'm better hoooah" or patronize you in any way.

And yet on the occassion like tonight when I have a stellar moment at bat and hit a 3 base run..your masculinity is threatened and you storm off home in a huff..

And men says women are complicated? Puh...Pot...Kettle Black?

No Vacancies in the Cranium..

Not till I'm out of high school mom...

Sometimes to kill the monotony I will intentionally have bizzaro conversations with Vincent, completely nonsense exchanges, that exist only to make us both laugh, or to mess with his brilliant little mind.

Last night on the way to soccer Vincent was telling me about a kid in his class that was held back last year, and how funny he is.
To which I replied.."Funny..how?...Like Funny HA HA...or Funny weird"
"Funny HA HA, At the end of the day when we're leaving and he has to go to SAC he throws himself against the windows on the front door like he's a prisoner, and he's always falling on his face"
"I dont know Vin, that sounds funny in the head, he hasn't tried to kiss you or anything has he?" I ask in mock seriousness.
"No Mom, he just hilarious, not funky" (rolling his eyes)
"Well ok, but dont let him try to kiss you"
"Mom, I am not Gay"
"Well I know that" (glancing sideways at him) "But it would be ok if you were..ya know"
"I like girls Mom"
"Wait, have you kissed a girl yet" I pretend to panic..
"Nope" shaking head vehemently
"Good Because you're way to young for that"
"I know, I'm waiting till...like, after I graduate from High School"
"You're waiting until AFTER you graduate High School?" arching brow
"Yep" confident nod of head
"Can I get that in writing perhaps, because I think a girl is gonna wanna kiss you long before that"
"Well I am not going to want to kiss her!" he states confidently.

BWAAA goodness.....kids are fun! Go get yourself some..

Penny on the Block!

I know I'm going to get it in the arse for this one..but whatever.

I live in a suburb just south of Washington D.C.
The original houses were all built in the 40's. Something around here affectionately called "Post WWII boom housing" they are built sturdy as hell, but for a family of considerably lower maintenance than todays (meaning at MAX two bathrooms)
The yard sizes are all willy nilly, with one of my neighbors having a postage stamp sized lawn, while another has a 1/2 acre (like me)
Anyway, my neighborhood for several years now has been a nice neighborhood sandwiched between two increasingly bad neighborhoods.
In these bad neighborhoods there is a predominately Latino population.
Including ones of the biggest representations of the beloved MS13 from El Salvador (yes the ones who hack up their enemies with Machetes)

And frankly I have always thought it wonderful my son goes to a school where there isnt a cultural whiteout, that he learns tolerance and appreciation of all races, creeds, colors and religions, Vincents first "girlfriend" was a chinese orphan with lesbians as parents..rock on!
I constantly rib my brother in Wisconsin that the only his kids see anyone who is not as white as white can be white is on TV.

Well, Penny aint so zen about it any more.

Theres a new phenom in town and I am not happy.

Frankly my hood is turning into a scary assed place and I dont like it.

Small slab ramblers are being sold/bought, promptly gutted down to one wall, and then these ugly McMansions are being thrown up, and two or three latino families are shacking up together.

No lawn mowing is occuring, no house maintence at all. In fact sheets are the currently curtain of choice. But no matter what there's a "Dish" or two stuck somewhere in the yard.
GOD FREAKIN FORBID YOU MISS "EL FOOTBALL" TO MAYBE MOW YOUR FREAKIN LAWN!!!!
But then how can they mow...when their cars are parked ON their front lawns??

I walk my dogs in the evening (and thank you god they give a WIDE berth when I've got Brutus on the line)and curse these dillweeds vehemently under my breath.
I no longer live in a nice friendly neighborhood.
Car vandalizations are rampant, as are muggings and even a MURDER? what the hell is that?
My brother keeps attempting to get me to move to Pissconsin, but I dont see that being the answer either.

There, a nice politically incorrect rant from Penny.

Forgive my intolerance, even I am not perfect.

Sometimes you just wanna scream

I have spent the entire morning modifying a server list of about 5 thousand records. And then pffft the power went out. Yes I saved a good portion of it, but still. I have to redo the other brainfrying portion..

Happy Happy Joy Joy..Happy Happy Joy.

Well that's why it's called a personal life.

This past weekend a friend who reads my blog asked me why I never talk about my dating/love life on here. I figured there are enough women who fancy themselves "Bridget Jones" on the freakin internet already. Besides why on earth would someone be interested?

Fine. I cave to pressure.

I'll keep it brief. Yes I have a person I see with regularity.
He is currently a Combat Medic in the Army.
He is very good to me, and claims to like me quite alot.
He is also very intelligent, and absolutely adorable.
And harking back to a blog of many moons ago... I am absolutely certain that I could not take him in a fight (not that the event would ever arise to test this theory)

Nosey buggers...are you happy now?

Wait is my blog about my life? Or is my life about my blog??

You know your blogging is getting out of hand when you have a conversation with a friend on the telephone about your blogs..and the comments you have left on each others blogs.
Clearly I need an intervention..

Maybe he can take up cross stitch..

I, as luck (snort) would have it..happen to work within sneezing distance of the US Federal Courthouse...
Yes THAT courthouse...where Zacarias Moussaoui is/was being tried

This has bunged up traffic to a point that is almost inexplicable..not to mention security as been tighter than a *ahem*

I have become accustomed to seeing federal marshals with assault weapons on the roof of my parking garage..and looking out the window during a meeting and watching my car get sniffed by a bomb dog..stranger still.

Well today they read the verdict.
Life in prison..no chance of parole.
And..that is that.

L i f e i n p r i s o n, no chance of parole...sentencing next week.